Revelations

I've come to some very important revelations in my life lately and I'm putting them in this blog so that I don't forget and don't lose focus on them.

#1 God's plan is what's important. After all that I've been through, I still somehow get this false idea that I know what's best for my life. Well, maybe not that so much as in my desire to want things now, not later, which, in a sense, is saying that I don't trust God and his perfect timing. My plan's would just lead to catastrophe. If I don't make a certain amount of money or own a home or have fully figured out what I want to do with my life, work-wise that is, so what. I'm single and still, fairly, young so I can enjoy life as it stands now. In just 5 weeks, I will have my "mystery" credit card paid off and then I'm going to save up for a motorcycle. By next spring, I will be cruising around in joy.

#2 Life is full of unexpected twists. Sort of like when you found out Bruce Willis was a ghost. Life has those twists. As I look like, what seemed like a major life catastrophe a couple months ago really wasn't that important. Better to break up than end up with the wrong person. Without seeming to bash her in any way, I'm really glad that it ended. Our personalities did not match and I would rather be single the rest of my life than marry someone who would drive me crazy and I'm sure she feels the same way.

#3 People with issues are not fun times. Being somebody who has been labeled as somebody with "issues" in the past, and maybe still am by some crowds of people (who don't know me, of course, because they are the best judges of who I am inside...), I have looked myself in the mirror and have begun to see somebody different. Facing who you are and accepting it is a very important step in life and growth, emotional, mental, and spiritual. Guess what? I get angry. So do lots of people. It's what makes me the person I am. But what makes me a man is how I handle that anger. Guess what? I'm a couple pounds over weight. But I've quit smoking 4 times. And I definitely eat a LOT more fruits and vegetables than I did a year ago. And now that I've got some medicine for my stomach, I can go back to the gym. I want to be one of those people without issues. Or at least the major ones. Find me somebody without issues and I'll give you a million bucks.

#4 Life can hit you hard. Why do we fall down? So we can pick ourselves back up again. That quote from Batman Begins is just awesome. Life will hit and it hits hard. It doesn't wear boxing gloves or hold its punches. This is a bar brawl and somebody will end up in the ER, if you know what I mean. But what do we do when life hits us. In the past 3 months, I've gone through a lot. A break-up with somebody that I was convinced I was going to spend the rest of my life. I mean, I've never really looked at rings before. Tim and Andrea are leaving and "my" boys are going with them. I've been watching their kids since Riley was tiny and before Ethan could walk. My nickname, R.J., comes from Ethan and is confusing J.R. with the raccoon from Over the Hedge, haha. Now, everybody is starting to call me R.J. They've been an awesome part of my life, their whole family. My brother is getting married and though I am extremely excited and happy for him, it is sad in some ways. Though I have come to embrace being single and really enjoy the benefits that comes with it, I still long for a family.

#5 Life can be fun no matter where you are at. We had an awesome cookout on Tuesday night for Tim and Andrea leaving. I got to know Elaina and her bro, Andy, some more. I got to see pregnant Jessie Burkman, whom I haven't seen in well over a year. Fun times. A buddy of mine is back playing WoW and I still have a blast owning nubs with my clan. Life is what you make it and you can either mope around (which rarely do these days) or you can go out and have some fun. I'm planning on buying a motorcycle this year unless I move out to CA. If I do that, which I'm considering, I will need moving money but once out there, I can buy a bike and ride it year round. No snow, the ocean, the desert, Arnold as my governor, could be lots of fun. We'll see what God has planned.